Kinship
When we develop deep kinship bonds with other people, love and care for their wellbeing is an automatic byproduct of these cords of connection. We become interested in their stories, their dreams and their woundings. We appreciate them for their own special uniqueness in our life.
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In modern culture, kinship bonds mostly do not exist except within nuclear family. People tolerate one another and create contractual narratives to share space together in ways that are often driven solely by their own needs of the other, rather than a deep, swirling, vulnerable relational sharing. There are mild enjoyments, occasional peak moments of connection, and a certain level of care for our friends and extended family, but they fall mighty short of the constant levels of bonded connection within tribe that our primal ancestors experienced. And that is the blueprint that our souls yearn to return to.
Forming kinship bonds with the natural world is also essential. As the trees, birds, rivers, sky and ocean become our close kin, we automatically care for their wellbeing as we would the wellbeing of our own children or parents.
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When we have these bonds weaving us tightly into the cosmic matrix of life on Earth, love is a natural unfolding. Love cannot be forced. It comes pouring forth from this deep experience of kinship. Love and a relationship with Spirit arise from this foundation.
When kinship bonds are tight, dislike can happen. Conflict can happen. Even violence can happen. We are safe to be authentic, vulnerable and make mistakes. The kinship bond holds us in integrity even in these difficult circumstances because our primal nature absolutely knows that the wellbeing of other is crucial to the wellbeing of self.
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Modern spirituality often tries to skip the lost processes of primal connection and come to love and light through working solely upon the higher energy centres (chakras). But love and light come about from returning to right relationship with each other and with the Earth. When we do this, love is a natural outcome. It simply flows forth in a constant stream once we are immersed in primal living. If we ignore the primal in favour of the ‘heavenly’, we force and bypass and have to continuously scaffold the glimmers of love and light that arise. This comes also at a cost of ignoring our shadow, which inevitably makes itself known to further wound and perpetuate trauma and division.
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Kinship bonds are the ties that bind unconditional loving of one another into the warp and weft of daily living, with all its ups and downs. Do not underestimate how learning and remembering how to do this can profoundly change the world. And is, in my view, essential for any future we hope to have here on this beautiful planet.
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Victoria McKay